My Favorite Word: There is not real logic to this...

My Favorite word. Ever.

ascertain (verb): To make certain, clear, or understood.

I like this word, it's pronounced ah-sir-tay-nnnn. I like it because the pronounciation makes me giggle. It's used like, "I'm going to ask you a few questions, but don't worry, I'm only trying to ascertain some information, ma'm."

Free Write: It's like my mind just threw up all over the paper. Enjoy.

"Take the first line of your favorite song and write a story using it as the first line." (Taken from Reader's Digest.com)

"Who have I been kidding? I sold my soul to the coporation." (first two lines from Sell Out by Never Shout Never.) I snap, shrieking into the heavens, and drop my coffee directly on my leather dress shoes. Exasperated, I aggressively ran my hands through my hair. Why am I doing this!? Asking the question that I already know the answer to. Running the answer over and over in my head I search for my keys in the ocean of my deep coat pocket. My hand touches something unfamilar. Why is there a folded piece of paper in my pocket? It's a worn piece of paper, frayed from many washings. How did I never notice this before? I delicately open the fragile manuscript, my hands shaking, afraid that the slightest movement will destroy it. The paper opens to show a scribbled pciture, obviously done by a child. The pictures shows a big stick figure holding hands with a little stick figure. I automatically think of Sammy and sure enough in the corner of the picture, very largely, there is her name scribbled, with an upside down "a." My cheeks get hot. How long has it been since I was home? It seems like an eternity. She must be ten by now. I can't leave. I need to stay here for my job. Tracy and the kids need food, a house, and all the luxuries don't they? I run all the answers over in my head, but they seem dry and forced. I guess now is the time to think of my priorities. I pick up my phone,

"Hello!? Jim?" I hear Tracy's voice full of disbelief on the other end. I reply,

"Yes, honey. It's me, I'm coming home."

Idiosyncrasies: Good gollie I love that word!

For those of you that don't know what idiosyncrasies means (like me about a month ago..) it means certain charactoristics or habits that are unique to an individual. So it's basically the stuff that you do that makes you, you. Here are a couple crazy things not very many people know about me:

1. I hate feet! Oh my gosh. I hate people touching my feet, so foot massages are out of the question, and I hate seeing people touch each others feet. Feet wearing socks are fine.
2. I read in the bathroom sometimes. Sounds gross, but sometimes I just want to read without people talking to me at the same time.
3. I hate when people touch my hair, well not all the time. I like it when people do my hair, but if you are just going to drag your sticky fingers through my hair, seperating the curls, tangling it, and making it frizzy, please just don't.
4. My favorite band is Anberlin, and I guessed it, you don't know who they are...(If you do know of them, then you will be my best friend.)
5. Walking at night scares me.
6. I swallow gum more then I should. If you want to know how much I swallow gum, let me jsut say this, I swallow it more then I spit it out.
7. It makes me furious when people complain about their weight. Most of the time they do it for attention, and frankly, no body cares how big they are. The thing that turns people off more then weight is people that don't eat and call themselfs fat. If you don't like yourself the way you are, either learn to like yourself, or change it. Complaining does nothing but make you hate yourself.
8. I used to bit my nails in middle school, but I trained myself not to.
9. Sometimes I eat things off the floor of my house when I drop them, but only if no one say.
10. I like being home alone.
11. I'm a terrible speller.
12. Cocky people make me mad.
13. I think that Justin Beiber jokes are old now.

Curiouser and Curiouser: A strange thought in math class.

I was sitting in math class, doing what ever I could to focus on any thing but law of cosins and triangles, when I realized that I was seated by the window. It was a wonderful suprise, and I distracted myself by imagining things in the courtyard. My though process went like this:

Oh! Look at the tree. It looks all dead and nasty...wait, the top of the tree looks alot like roots. What if the tree was really growing from the sky, and no one knew that? What if all trees grew from the sky, and they just hovered there? That would be awesome. You could walk under the tree everyday, and then suddenly it would be so tall that you would hit your head. Oh, there are paper snow flakes on the windows. What if in the world I was imagining it snowed paper snow flakes? That would be pretty great, you would jsut need to be careful not to get papercuts on the top of your head. That would suck. Oh, and it would rain fruit, because all of the trees are upside down.

So I just thought that I would share that memory because it makes me happy.

Live Like There's No Tomorrow:What a terrible thing to think about

I really hate motivational posters that say "Live like theres no tomorrow!" or "Live like you're dying!" or "Live every day like it's your last!" How morbid is that!? That's terrible. Telling people to live there lifes like they wont be arround the next day. I get the fact that it is trying the convey the notion of living so that you will have no regretts, but I just don't like the idea of constantly looking to the past instead of the future. That's why I really like the Kaiser Permente ad that says, "Live like there's no yesterday." That's my life statement. When someone asks me to simplify my whole life into one statement I will say, "I lived like there was no yesterday." It just seems freeing to have your life not be chained by the past, but instead be open to new chances for happiness and adventure.

Free Write: Read it if you want

I guess that the one thing I want out of life is to be happy, I really don't have any big dreams. I want to grow up get married live a wonderfully average life. Have children and I want to celebrate my 50th aniversery with my husband, in the same house that we have lived in for 50 years. I want a  house with a wrap around porch. I want a house with lots of windows and a porch swing. I want a two story house with a kitchen that is always warm with something baking. I want to grow old and be healthy. I want to be old with hands worn down from work and a scuffed wedding ring. I want a pastel house with white shutters. I want a dog, a small dog. I want grandchildren. I want a large family that visits in the winter. I want to live in a place where it snows on christmas. I want to live in a house with shutters, two stories, a rap around porch, and a porch swing. I want to get married. I want to grow old with my husband. I want to be happy.